


The Loose End

by orphan_account



Series: Puzzles [2]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Chloe kinda sucks in this one sorry, Ella Lopez & Lucifer Morningstar Friendship, Ella Lopez Finds Out, Ella is best science nerd, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode: s04e07 Devil Is as Devil Does, Fluff and Angst, Hurt Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV), Hurt/Comfort, S I M B O L I S M, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, chloe decker/ luicfer morningstar i guess??? If you squint???, idk I might add more tags later, post-episode: s04e07 Devil Is As Devil Does
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2020-12-31 02:35:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21051656
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: A continuation of 'Devil-May-Care-A-lot', post season4 episode 7:After Linda left, Lucifer decides to set things straight once and for all and talk to Ella again of his monstrous appearance and now-leathery-wings. Not that he was expecting much positive feedback from her. He was a monster, wasn't he?She couldn't have actually cared about him...





	1. Contemplating

Truth was, he was panicking.

Lucifer paced in his bedroom after Dr. martin had left, worrying away at his lip till it stung and bled. He prodded at it with his silk handkerchief, resolving to grind his teeth together instead as he tried to maintain even breaths.

He glanced behind him, licking his lips, half expecting to see those monstrous leathery appendages spring out of his back like huge disgusting weeds. He almost preferred the flashy feathers he had once had, almost missing the luminous heavenly wings that father- No. That he had plagued himself with. He had begun to warm up to those blindingly white masses of feathers when they had saved the detective’s life from Cain’s men.

And of course. Of course, when he had actually been beginning to appreciate his damned feathers, they did a 180 and turned into the hideously deformed gargoyle wings.

The worst part of it was, he’d done it all to himself. Because he simply believed he was a disgusting monstrosity, his wings decided to reflect his beliefs. They were like an angelic mood ring: reflecting his deepest, darkest, hidden away thoughts like some sickening art form.

It wasn’t as if he could just change his belief, and, subsequently, his wings, like that! Just think differently and make his swan-like wings reappear miraculously!

Because his thoughts were true, weren’t they? The claim that the Devil was a monster? An all evil force? They were the truth, weren’t they?

The detective had always told him that they needed evidence to prove a thought, to claim someone was guilty.

Well, he had plenty of evidence! Didn’t he?

Dozens of eyewitness accounts, so many witnessing his hideously terrifying, monstrous true form, and claiming he was a monster! There were hundreds of written documents, all depicting the root of all evil, the worst of the worst, the great monster from hell, to be Satan. Oh, and don’t even get him started on all the sins he himself can testify to. Potent Drugs, lustful hobbies, strongly scented alcohol, all illegal, of course. Oh, and he had literally murdered people.

He was as guilty as all the criminals they had put away. As terrible as all those handcuffed suspects.

He was truly a monster.

And those damning wings just supported his claim even more.

Lucifer was still pacing back and forth. A fist was now raised to his mouth as he tried to stifle his uneven breaths. His pristine Prada coat was thrown down to the floor, his expensive ass shirt rolled up to his elbows, wrinkled and with a few less than discreet alcohol stains

Although…

He stopped pacing, and sat heavily on his bed, still biting his fist.

When he and the detective were searching for their victim’s murderer (which, though he was pained deep inside to say it, he was pretty sure they’d never do again seeing as she knew how horrifying he really was) they had to make sure all the evidence matched up. Tie up all loose ends before they finally confirm that yes, this really was their killer.

And...he did have to admit...his claim wasn’t rock solid. He did have..one loose end. One piece of evidence that didn’t fit for some reason. Like an infuriating last piece in a puzzle that was hiding somewhere in the cheap carpeting beneath your feet, making it impossible to complete the image depicted in said puzzle.

The loose end’s name was Ella.

Ella Lopez. Charming Miss Lopez with her loving nature and scientific rants and indescribable kindness as she had accepted him and his terrifying looks.

Ella’s reaction just didn’t add up. It was the complete opposite of what he had experienced with every other person who had seen his monstrous ways. She had comforted him. Comforted The Devil himself. The irony would’ve been hilarious if his mental health wasn’t spiraling downward like someone pulled the drain in the bathtub of his sanity.

He swallowed, looking up, as if someone would actually care enough to look back at him.

Lucifer had made up his mind. He was going to do what Ella called a “Re-take” in her many forensic experiments. He was going to walk over to Miss Lopez’s house and demand answers for why she was the missing, deformed piece of the puzzle that just wouldn’t fit in! For why she and she alone was the exception to the norm. If she simply hadn’t realized the implications of his supernatural origin, or had gone completely mad, or any other reason that would tie up the loose strand of evidence into a nice and neat knot, closing up the case of his self-loathing for good.

So he stood, took a few sharp breaths in until he couldn’t constantly hear his heart pounding around in his head, threw on his slick silken suit, and strode towards the elevator purposefully. His feet pounding the cold floor with a destination in mind and a mission to accomplish.


	2. La Casa De Lopez

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took kinda long to post this. Probably second to last chapter. Anyway, enjoy.

Lucifer...hadn’t talked to Ella in a while.

Or, he had avoided all contact with her since that day, was a better way of putting it.

He could still remember the warm, meaningful embrace. The love and acceptance that seemed alien and unfamiliar. Yet he was drawn to it hopelessly, starving and craving the sensation.

Nevertheless, they eventually let go, and he gracelessly answered Ella’s awkward questions of supernatural beings and celestial matters and Do you have wings??? Or Sooooooo, what did you do to all those traumatized suspects? The stuff he expected, of course.

And then, eventually, a call had come from Lux (a bar fight of some sort, demanding for the manager) he had to go answer, and they said awkward farewells and both struggled to figure out how to move forward from this.

Well, it seemed they would find out soon. As the engine of one of his many expensive cars was roaring down LA. Rain lashed at the windows and thunder growled in the distance, roaring from some far-away place up in the sky.

They say that when angels in heaven cry, it’s what creates rain.

He doubted any of his siblings would cry over him.

The wind swept its way across the sidewalk, twirling and twisting leaves as if they were possessed. Gusts of air flipped Lucifer’s hair around wildly as he pulled up at Ella’s house. He was here. This was it. The moment. The time that he got answers. He almost regretted coming, it would have been nice to live in a fantasy where Ella was blind to the horrific beast that lived in a penthouse at Lux and worked in a precinct at the LAPD.

He shivered as the tires squealed, rolling to a stop. He opened the door and sighed, trudging to the door. This was it.

He stopped at the door, raised his hand, and hesitated. The wind kept messing up his already-birdnest hair. his suit swayed to the wind’s command as the dark black sky rained down in indifference as he stood there, frozen, fist ready to come down.

He checked his watch. 11:30 PM. She was probably asleep already. No reason to knock at such a late house, right? Maybe he could do it tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow, such an important event could wait until ideal conditions, right?

Lucifer had already been tricked once. Chloe had said she had accepted him too, smiling and gazing lovingly at him. And he had allowed himself to become weak with hope and desperation for someone who finally would just like him without any more strings attached or conditions. It had blinded him to Chloe’s true nature. Her true feelings about that hellish side of him.

Honestly, he couldn’t blame her. He would have run away from himself as well if he had the chance. Would’ve left the monster behind in the dust and get away from it’s disgusting clutches as fast as possible.  
Ella was smart. She’d figure out there was no good to be found in trying to help him. He’d leave him, at least for a while (like Dr. Martin).

You’re just stalling...you know what she’ll consider you...a freak. Monster. Beast. The devil. Just get it over with already...find out the answer to your question. The quest for answers didn’t scare you when facing dad, so why should it scare you now?

He took in a sharp breath of the cold air, smelling the rain. He released it, and sharply knocked 3 times on the door.

Lucifer looked down, mentally stealing himself for this. For the eventual rejection. He had had drugs and alcohol shipped over to the penthouse in bulk that afternoon, enough to put his sobriety powers of being immortal to the test. He was set for at least a week of mourning and then burying his feelings later. He had run through all the versions of rejection she could give him: From violently throwing things and screaming with heartbreaking tears running down her eyes, to breaking down in the corner, traumatized and begging for lucifer to rid himself from her existence.

His head snapped upwards when he heard the door open. Ella was standing there, rubbing her eyes and yawning. Her arms fell to the sides of her robin blue star wars pajamas (with a little R2D2 sticking out its head from the pocket). Her bleary eyes blinked… and then blew wide open as she finally processed in her sleep-deprived brain what she was seeing. He made to say hello, but she beat him to it.

“Lucifer!” she gasped. And he flinched back, the tone of voice sending into a protective mindset, everything in his head screaming to prepare for the worst.

Ella, however, didn’t notice. She grabbed his wrist and pulled him through the doorway, “Jeez dude! What’re you doing outside my house?! It’s raining cats and dogs out there!” she pointed a finger at him, eyebrows scrunching up as she waggled it in small, slow circles, “Stay right there. I…am getting you a towel before you get everything wet,”

He scoffed, staying in character as the devil-may-care, hardship-free Lucifer Ella had known until she moved out of his sight range.

Light from Ella’s hallway glinted off his jacket cufflinks as he fidgetted with them, anxiously. No turning back now. He tried taking a few deep breaths, gathering together his thoughts and preparing what he needed to say mentally.

Ella returned with a warm, fuzzy blanket. Taking his soggy suit and waterlogged shoes away to somewhere he couldn’t see. Not that it really mattered, he probably wouldn’t stay long enough to get them back.

He dried himself, to Ella’s approval, and handed her the towel, walking, almost tiptoeing into the living room, where he had last really interacted with Ella. It felt wrong, being in her house. As if he was intruding on some precious event he really shouldn’t have disturbed.

“Now,” Ella started. Lucifer’s attention flickered back to her as she crossed her arms, “So far, I’ve done all the talking. And you still haven’t told me why you were on my doorstep at 11 PM in the rain.” 

She pursed her lips, giving a quick glance to her computer on the coffee table before returning her gaze to Lucifer, “You’re lucky I was taking an all-nighter on filing out these forensic reports. But, anyway,” she looked Lucifer in the eyes as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other, “What did you need to come here for?”


	3. Miss Lopez Finds Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is from Ella's point of view, right after the last chapter
> 
> And Ao3 has ONCE AGAIN ruined my formating

Ella settled her hands on her hips as she waited for an answer. Projecting a nice and serious vibe as she stood expectantly, her drowsy eyes narrowed under bushy eyebrows. Her expression was sturdy, almost wooden as she tried to keep her emotions at bay, wrapped up, and shoved into a dark corner.

She hadn’t seen Lucifer in...Well, she had seen him, but he’d been busy talking to Chloe or being a hungover, club-going mess. Sure, they’d technically talked, but not seriously or about much of importance, just about a case or some evidence. A blood sample here, a DNA specimen there. No real words were exchanged, just information.

So to have him show up, torrents of rain sliding off him, knock at Ella’s door at almost midnight…

Ella was hoping they were finally, finally going to talk about this.

Lucifer smiled, or tried to, “I… Hope I didn’t wake you, Miss Lopez”

“Ella”

“Right, Ella” he corrected himself, making a face, as if the name tasted foreign in his mouth.

“And you didn’t wake me up,” she assured him, “I was filling out some files in Forensics, remember?”

“Right, yes” he exhaled sharply, eyes flickering around. He took in a deep breath...

“...So -” she was going to ask why he came here again, but Lucifer beat her to it.

“Why are you a bent puzzle piece?” he asked, abruptly.

“Excuse me?”

“Look, I admit, I phrased that wrong,” he said. Apparently, that starting sentence was all he needed to get going, “But it is a fair analogy, Miss Lo- Ella…” 

Lucifer paced into her living room as she sat down on the couch, settling in.

“Okay…” she said, wondering where this was going.

“It’s just- see-” He sighed, running a hand down his face, scratching at his stubble.

“Everyone- and I mean everyone- that has ever seen that...that side of me...that terrible, monstrous side of me” he laughed hollowly, slowing his pace as he faced away from Ella, “They...all just ran. Screaming, begging for mercy, looking for a weapon, anything.” he finally looked at her, the ghost of a smile on his face, “an excellent example of a human’s fight or flight response, wouldn’t you say?”

“Lucifer…”

He continued on, “But what I don’t get,” he turned towards Ella, the dark, malicious, hatred-filled tone fading away from his voice, “what I don't get,” he repeated, “is why you didn’t”

“Because I’m your friend Lucifer I car-” Ella tried before he cut her off once again in that cold tone.

“Bullshit” he snarled, looking away, “Dr. Martin was traumatized for what? A week?”

“Dozens of suspects, dozens of witnesses” he paced wildly, “Those people in the mental hospitals…”

“I’ve tortured people, Ella!” He growled, “Down in hell. I’ve hurt people! I’ve done unspeakable things.”

Lucifer strode from side to side, like a beast kept too long in their cage. His hands shook as he spoke, “So why?! Why are you different?? Why must you be the one inconsistency?”

His tone died down as he looked to Ella, so lost, demanding answers.

“Why can’t you see that I'm a monster?” Lucifer pleaded softly, “Please I...Chloe already hurt enough. If you’re just pretending...you can say so”

Ella looked stricken, sitting on the sofa, frozen in shock.

“So now you realize,” he said softly, shoulders falling, misinterpreting her silence.

“I’ll let myself out-”

He was interrupted by a low, deathly quiet whisper from Ella.

“I…” she said, bracing herself on the couch, “am going to fucking kill Chloe”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the relatively short chapters, it really just fits better splicing it up like that, to me at least


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea what type of POV this is? Third? Second? I'm tired.
> 
> last chapter!
> 
> also a short chapter but I'm tired I wanna write other stuff stahp judging.

Lucifer was now still as Ella stood up. “I...That…” he said, confusing overriding his previous negativity, “What?”.

Ella tilted her chin up, gaze razor-sharp as she tried to level her breathing. She swallowed reflectively, “You, are, by all means, not a monster, or a beast.”

“I-”

“And,” she said, emphasizing the word enough to cut Lucifer off, “all those suspects? Chloe? They’re idiots. All of them.”

“Well,” Lucifer objected, scoffing slightly, “I mean, Chloe is an accomplished, incredibly smart detect-”

“An idiot, for overlooking all the things you’ve done for her,” she stepped towards Lucifer, wearing an unnaturally harsh expression that really didn’t fit in with her normally cheery exterior, “and choosing to see you as all those texts and manuscripts portrayed you.”

Lucifer meekly looked down and to the side, “They… aren’t wrong,”

“Oh yeah?” she challenged, staring him down, “They’ve literally never met you before, I bet they don’t even really know what you like.

“I’ve known you for, what? Years now?” she continued as her voice and gaze softened, “And the whole time I’ve known you, you’ve been a brave, selfless, compassionate person, who's constantly looking to improve the lives of others.”

“You’re not evil,” she said sadly, shaking her head as Lucifer stared at her in awe and disbelief, nearly daring to hope her words were true.

“I’m...I’m not sure, exactly, what to say.” he laughed hollowly, eyes wide as he took Ella in.

“I…thank you, Ella.”

She smiled, “No problem, I just don’t know why you needed to come here at the dead of night to know that,” she tried to joke.

Bad move, Lopez! Were her exact thoughts as she saw his expression just fall.

“I, er,” Lucifer’s hands flew to his cufflinks, fidgeting and playing with them anxiously, “See, do you, um, remember those, uh, wings? I told you about?”

“Uh-huh?” she steered them both to the couch, sitting down lightly as lucifer plopped down and rocked back and forth, stilling as he met her questioning gaze.

“They’re um. Well no,” he reconsidered, “they’re not exactly back. Or, they have yet to be restored to their full glory, I guess.”

“...”

“I...I might make more sense if you just viewed them,” he said, getting up and pacing in place before he gathered himself.

He stood, taking in a deep breath as Ella scooched closer. He closed his eyes and rolled his shoulders, once. Twice. And then unfurled them…

His eyes were squeezed tightly shut. He had no idea how she was reacting to this, given she hadn’t made a single sound. She might be in shock right now. The weight of his wings was a sharp reminder of what he truly was, the leathery membrane swishing through the air deafening to his ears. He itched and burned with the longing to just tear them off. The words were nice and reassuring, but they might not have been true. The hadn’t had the full story they words couldn’t mean much could th-

There was a hand on his wings, and a voice.

“They don’t define you as a monster,” she said gently, but Lucifer shook his head, eyes still shut.

“Wings reflect us, Miss Lopez.” he sighed, “how we...view ourselves…”

Silence. 

A shuffling sound.

“Well, I guess I’ll just have to convince you you’re not a monster,” she said simply.

Maybe she had been telling the truth…

“Holy shit!” she exclaimed, withdrawing her hand from the wings.

Lucifer opened his eyes, swinging around in alarm, “wh-”

He had to squint to see through the blinding light emanating from his wings, which were now clad in the biggest, strikingly pale feathers. Lucifer flapped them experimentally, relishing in the sound of downy feathers rustling against each other.

He grinned.

**Author's Note:**

> Gonna continue this soon when I get the chance


End file.
